Station Wagon Boggie

When I got home from work I took a short nap. 8 O'clock that night I loaded my car up and drove over to Bobs house. It was 11 O'clock by the time we got his old station wagon loaded with the packs and dogs. We had a six-hour drive ahead of us but by the time we left the city lights, I was asleep in the front seat.
 
Ka-wham! I shot upright from my slumped position in the front seat. My eyes sniped open, the road was no longer in front of the station wagon and the headlights revealed a dense wall of Evergreens.

"John! Get the dogs off of me." I turned and looked at Bob. I had to shake my head to clear the image before my eyes. Bobs Irish setter "Brendon" had his head and shoulder through the steering wheel and his chin was resting on the dash. Bob was struggling to gain control of the fish tailing station wagon, but with each turn of the wheel, Brendon would either have his head in Bob's lap, or the turn signal handle would be pushing Brendon upper lip over his nose, causing Brendon to howl in a high and unnatural tone.

My dog "Doc" was down along Bobs left side, his collar caught on the door handle, Doc had his paw in Bobs groin, and every time he pulled back, the door would open, and Bob would yell in a high and unnatural tone.

"Get them off, get them off!" Bob screamed disparately. I crawled into the back seat and took hold of Brendon and I pulled with all my might. Brendon broke loose and both of us went rolling back through the packs, boots and groceries. Bob slammed on the brakes, Brendon and I stopped in a mid-roll, the nose of the wagon went down and the rear came up, Brendon and I went airborne.

A bright light came on right next to my face from under the dash when Bob opened his door. Brendon dug his toenails into my stomach as he shot out the open door. Bob came around and opened my car door, I spilled out onto the ground, with Bob's help, I stood up on shakily legs. "What happened?" I gasped. "I don't know" Bob wheezed.

Since the motor was still running, we knew it was all right. We walked around the station wagon and spotted the cause of our near destruction. A large part of a retread tire had come loose and was dangling; barely attached to the bald tire. The dogs had been sleeping in the rear of the station wagon, when the dangling retread hit the steel floor, no wonder the dogs jumped into Bob's lap. I held the flashlight, while Bob changed the tire. He replaced the battered tire with his "Spare tire" it was round and bald.

"You know Bob, I haven't seen the dogs since they got out of the wagon." Bob got up from his knees. "Let's go look for them" I turned the flashlight out towards the woods, not more then twenty feet away, stood the dogs, shoulder to shoulder united in their decision never to enter the monster wagon again. The dogs would not come to us so we had to walk out and pick them up and carry them back to the wagon. We put the dogs in the back; they looked at us for one second, then jumped into the front seat.

There sat the four of us, Doc across my lap, Brendon on his haunches in the middle, and Bob once again behind the wheel. We still had a four-hour drive ahead of us as we continued down the highway. About an hour later, Bob turned to me and says. "John, I got to get some sleep."

"Find a place to park, and we will sleep in the wagon for a couple hours Bob." Bob turned off on to a dirt road then pulled over and stopped. We both got into the back of the wagon. We rolled out our sleeping bags and in a matter of minutes man and beast alike were sound asleep.

Ka-wham! Dogs and men were catapulted into a frantic melee of elbows, feet and paws as the dogs sped around the interior yelping and looking for a way out of the demon. Bob and I ended up nose to nose. "What happen now Bob?" "You knew that tire I put on was bald, John."

We did not go out and check for damage, instead we arranged our sleeping bags at a suitable angle, and spent the night in a 30-degree list. The next morning we limped into town and purchased the exact replica of Bobs spare for five dollars. This whole trip was a mess so we just turned around and headed home.

Go to Rewind the Fifties Home